Project No Yell

Could You Go a Week Without Yelling at Your Kids?

It is so sad to say that when this question was first posed on a site I frequent, my immediate thought was 'heck no!' Believe me, I try. I try and try and try. Many a night, I go to bed thinking I am such a horrible mom and how abusive I am to my kids. I vow to not yell and not get so upset and frustrated with my kids the next day. Needless to say, I break my own vows each day. Sometimes even before I see them when they are yelling and being loud in the morning and therefore waking up their little brother. So I start off the day yelling. It's horrible.

I read the article, Could You Go a Week Without Yelling at Your Kids?, and was quite amused. I totally knew how the mom felt and what she went through on a daily basis.

But just because I understand and do the same, it doesn't make it right. I don't want my children's childhood memories to be of me yelling all the time. My husband has said on more than one occasion that he doesn't like me to yell (although he does more than his fair share!) because it reminds me of his own childhood. I do not want that for my children.

So here, yet again, I will try. I am not going to set out a goal for a week because that just seems so impossible. Although ultimately, the goal is for a lifetime. One day at a time is how I am going to approach it. I am fortunate that my children still tell me they love me and give me hugs and kisses at the end of the day that I do not demand or ask for. So I cannot be that horrible, but it is bad enough that I know better.

Today is a new day and day one. So far so good. I think it did help that the boys did wake up and play quietly instead of their usual loud ruckus in the morning. I have not raised my voice at all. Okay, I did have to raise my voice when I told them that they needed to clean up and that lunch was almost ready. In my defense, they were downstairs in the playroom while I was upstairs in the kitchen. The only way of getting out of raising my voice was to physically go downstairs and tell them the same thing. Not happening with my pregnant self and besides, I was in the middle of making lunch.

There was a bit of fighting in the morning between L and Z. I did not get involved until it sounded like it went on a little bit too long and I heard that L stepped on Z. I went to the living room to see what was going on and reprimanded L in a calm voice - yay me! Only when he was poking Z with his light saber did I just step over to take away the toy to put into a time out. L started with his crying but I did not get upset or annoyed and repeated what he had done wrong.

There was a repeat between L and Z a little bit later because Z decided to take discipline into his own hands and hit L with a water bottle. I kept out of it again until it sounded like the situation was not going to be resolved. I again stepped in and took the water bottles away from Z. And that was the extent of it. A little bit of crying on Z's part but no yelling from me.

So it's now mid-afternoon and it's looking good. One day at a time. One day at a time.